Fall Brings Changes

It's about time that I do a complete overhaul on my life. I really need to make some positive  changes to help me move forward on the happiness track. I think we all go through periods where we feel like we are just getting by and going through the motions of everyday life; not really making any progress or finding any fulfilment or joy. A few years ago, President Thomas S. Monson, gave a talk that has always stuck but I haven't quite been able to figure out how to do it; it's entitled, "Finding Joy in the Journey". It is a process for me in figuring out just how to find that joy each day. Ironically, I have been given so many tools to find and feel joy and happiness in my life. Afterall, I know I am a child of God, I have a family here who loves me and that I can turn to, I have a strong support from church and a few close friends, I have the scriptures, I can pray. However, at times I still find I struggle in finding happiness despite these wonderful gifts. Sometimes my head just gets filled up with other things that so easily tear me down. Some things I can control and and somethings I cannot.

I have two beautiful sweet and fun little girls who I know I am so blessed to have. Why is it still so hard to just appreciate sometimes and simply smile and enjoy? I find I so easily focus on all the things that need to get done. I am always rushing and running late and therefore become irritable and angry. This is not the person I am. I can do better. When I was a teacher, I was calm and patient. Where did those qualities go? They need to be found.

This past weekend I had an incredible opportunity to go on a Power of Moms retreat held on Lake Winnipesaukee, NH. I was hoping it would give me a new perspective and I must say I got that and more! It is always so refreshing to hear I am not so alone in my struggles as a mother who wants to do the very best I can, but most frequently fall short.  I learned to take a step back, let go of some things and just listen. I was reminded that "I chose this". I chose to be a mother. I chose to stay home and give my children the best that I can. The best that I can is not always saying, "in a minute". My girls need to be heard and listened to. They need those simple small moments of fun. Nothing huge, just small moments throughout the day that help them feel they are loved and valued. I think that is likely to be one of the greatest gifts that I can give them throughout their lives. I don't have to master it all at once, but make small goals one at a time. My favorite quote of the weekend that is becoming a part of me is, "Motherhood is not a chore to endure, but a gift to be cherished". During those moments that my mind gets clouded and I feel like my children are becoming obstacles to getting things done, I remind myself .... a gift to be cherished.

First Day!

The day after Labor Day, summer has just about officially ended and fall begins with the first day of school. This is Little Miss Sunshine's third year of preschool. Just the other day I came across her class picture from her first year of preschool. She was so small then! One of these days when I learn how to use the scanner, I will include that to this post. I can't believe she will turn five in just a few months. The first year she went two days, the next three, and this year five mornings! Four would have been perfect in my opinion, but our town doesn't offer that in the public preschool program. Little Miss Sunshine has a different teacher, Mrs. Patrick, who seems highly organized and I so appreciate that the classroom is visually clear and uncluttered. Here's to another great year!

Keeping Busy

While cooped up inside all day awaiting Hurricane Irene, the girls enjoyed working on an art project. They painted the wood frames the day before, letting them dry overnight. Using glue, they added buttons and sequins. I still need to cover them with Modge Podge to ensure everything stays put.

New Park

Last week we ventured out and found a new park not far from our house. I can't believe we have lived here for 7 years and didn't know this place existed. There are hiking trails, a swimming hole, playground and more. Unfortunately, the bacteria levels can be high at this time of year, so we weren't able to swim. The girls had a great time on the playground and pretending the sand volleyball court was the beach!

Hot Commodity

My girls LOVE pumpkin chocolate chip muffins, so just yesterday I started up a batch (my third this summer). I had intended to halve the recipe, but midway realized I had not. After all the wet ingredients were mixed, I realized I was short a can of pumpkin. Wrapped it up, put it in the fridge, piled the girls into the car and off we went to our local Hannafords (our second trip that day!) Horrors of all horrors, the shelf was depleted of canned pumpkin. There had been several cans earlier that morning. What wierdos besides me use so much pumpkin during the summer?! I checked at three other stores only to come out empty handed. So much for pumpkin muffins until the holidays I suppose.

New Wheels

My sister-in-law had lent us my niece's old bike with training wheels, since my niece is now starting second grade and is onto bigger and better things. We need to return it in a couple of years however since my youngest niece (same age as Pupetta) will need it. We were happy for their generosity and for the prospect of saving some money. The lender bike is quite nice. It's a Specialized and it retails for about $130. A good, solid, bike. One would think Little Miss Sunshine would be thrilled about this bike, but she demonstrated a low preference for it and continued to seek out her beloved princess trike which is too too small for her now. While at Walmart one day, we strolled past the bike isle, and there it was! A beautiful bright pink Hello Kitty bike calling her name. It was just her size, color, and even had real ribbons hanging from the grips. After mulling it over a few days, I convinced Guitar Daddy that it would be a smart purchase since we would only have to buy one for Pupetta in a couple of years anyways. This way, Little Miss Sunshine would have some motivation and ownership and hopefully learn to ride a bike. Then, it could be passed down to Pupetta in time.

Little Miss Sunshine was not just given the bike. She had to earn it. After completing certain tasks, or showing good behaviors, she earned one token (a colored poker chip purchased at a teacher's store). After earning 10 tokens, she traded them in for one Hello Kitty token. After earning 6 Hello Kitty tokens (60 tokens in all) she would earn her bike. It took about a month and a half to earn the bike and towards the end I was more lenient with the token earning as I really just wanted her to have time to practice riding the bike. Finally, trade in day came! I should have bought the bike and stored it, but that would have been too easy. I waited until she had the tokens and then most of the local Walmarts were sold out. We located one online at a store an hour away. We hopped into the car and went out on our drive through rain, thunder and lightening. Finally, we arrived, and all were happy. Even Pupetta who got a new helmet out of the trip.

It's Potty Time!!!!!

Pupetta had he first success on the potty this past week! She actually told me she needed to do "poo poos" and she asked to sit on the big potty. Right away she earned a coveted Abby Cadabby sticker and a Starburst. Later that morning, we headed over to Hannafords and purchased mini marshmallows. This would be the perfect potty treat for her as she LOVES marshmallows. (Grandma keeps a stash for her at her house.) Naturally, she now has no interest in sitting on the potty again, but she will in time. I learned from my first time around with Little Miss Sunshine to be low key about it. My approach was over the top behavioralistic and it included taking data just like a true special educator. Too much pressure!!!!! (on both of us). So, I have told myself to just let it unfold and in time it will all work out.

Little Lamps

"My friends are little lamps to me, Their radiance warms and cheers my ways, And all the pathway dark and lone Is brightened by their rays. I try to keep them bright by faith, And never let them dim with doubt For every time I lose a friend A little lamp goes out.”

Elizabeth Whittemore

How thankful and comforted I am for the gospel to know that our little lamps of friendship NEVER need to go out.

Ten is Tin!!!!!

Ten years ago today - sealed in the Boston Massachusetts Temple. The traditional gift for 10 years is tin. Any ideas? Our babysitter just bailed, so we'll be having a rain check night out I suppose. Now it's last minute throw together a surprise nice dinner. At least I have a card :-) Oh, and hydrangeas are in order for a centerpiece since that was our wedding flower.

First Day

Today was Pupetta's first day of toddler group at her early intervention. Previously she attended a parent/child group where I accompanied her for the duration of the group. She moved up into a group of children a little older and now I drop her off (sniff). To ease the transition, she has the same teacher as she did for the previous group and Little Miss Sunshine had the same teacher as well. Pupetta was thrilled to have her own backpack and head off to "school" just like her big sister. Looking forward to next week.

Baking in Brewster

We had the opportunity to visit with some friends who were staying in Brewster last week. As it turned out, it was one of the hottest days of the summer. Generally the cape is cooler, but it didn't seem to hold true that day! It was over 100 degrees! The water was just perfect - cool enough to be refreshing, but comfortable enough that it was enjoyable. Despite how hot it was out of the water, my girls found a few moments to play in the sand.

A Chocoholic's Demise

MMMMmmmmm, chocolate. My favorite word, color, and food. I dream in chocolate. When I think of dessert, chocolate treats are the only option.
The splurge on excessive calories are only worth it to me if it involves chocolate. Chocolate ice cream, Hershey kisses, chocolate cookies, hot chocolate, chocolate milk, Nutella, chocolate chip pancakes are all staples in my life. The richer, gooeyer, chunkier, the better. Sad, but true.

Easter is on the horizon which yields choice after choice of chocolate treasures. Among my favorites are Cadbury Eggs (when Easter's gone, they're gone;-), Dove milk chocolate eggs, chocolate marshmallow bunnies and the list is endless.

It seems the curtain is abruptly closing on my chocolate act. For some time now I have had some unresolved digestive issues which have come to a head this winter. Without delving into embarrassing details, we'll just say I often look and feel pregnant because of all the strange stuff going on inside my body. At this stage of the process, I need to be milk free to help reduce some amount of inflammation. Milk free??!!!!! EEakkkkk!!! That means, gulp, chocolate free. It's been a week now and it hasn't been as bad as I had anticipated. It hasn't been too much work to alter my meals, but it's those treats that I'm missing.

At a visit to CVS today it took everything I had to pass by the Easter candy section as it was calling out so loudly. As we were getting into the car, my 20 month old requested, "Chocolate? Want chocolate" Probably not a bad idea for her to kick the habit either.

So, I will press forward, learning to live my life without my lifelong friend.