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From the age of 5, seemingly endless hours were spent in the pool as I swam for New England Swimming/AAU. The smell of chlorine is nostalgic. During life's tough times, I draw on my swimming experiences of discipline, coupled with my faith in Jesus Christ. I spent many years out west for my schooling in speech-language pathology and special education, before returning to NE to teach. Although I have a passion for teaching young children with special needs, I currently am at home with my own 2 sweet girls, both of whom have sensorineural hearing loss and are the greatest gifts in my life.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Holding Back the Tears

Today marked the first day of preschool for Pupetta! As much as I talk about wanting my own time, it was sad to leave her today. It marked a growing up step and that is hard for most mothers. It's great to see our children progress and move forward, but it is hard to let go.

She was thrilled to go to preschool as she knows she is now a "big girl". She will be attending just two days a week for the remainder of the school year. Up until now, she was attending an early intervention play group one morning a week where I would drop her off. It wasn't her favorite. Let's just say at times there were some boys in the group who could be a little rough and she was pushed a few too many times. When  I told her about preschool starting and no more group, her face lit up and she said, "Thank you Mommy! No more group."

We hadn't planned on sending her to preschool until September as she turns 3 in June. The public schools will be conducting evaluations to see if she requires any specialized services for preschool due to her hearing loss and by law they must be completed be her third birthday. The tricky part is, in a one to one testing situation, she likely will hear just fine, but in a larger group with background noise, that is where the challenges arise. I was fully ready to bring her to the school for a few appointments and were in shock that they decided to take her in and do all of the evaluations in the classroom setting. I am happy for the unexpected diligence on behalf of the schools, I just wasn't emotionally ready to send off my little fritter quite yet.

When I dropped her off, she said, "Bye mom." and quickly found a little girl to play with. Anyone who knows me knows it doesn't take much for me to cry, but I did have to hold them back when leaving the school. I'm sure in time I will relish in my free time, but for now I miss my little fritter beside me.